Sunday, February 6, 2011

Three Reasons to Value Your Own Approval Before Others

"To move forward in your life, you need to start valuing your own approval more than others.  You don't need anyone else's permission but your own."
               -Valorie Burton

When it comes down to making a choice make sure it is what you want and not solely to gain the approval of someone else.Here are three reasons why:

You may never gain their approval. For example, I've met people who spend their whole lives trying to meet their parents approval only to be criticized and put down over and over again.  It seemed that no matter how well they did or how they improved it just wasn't enough.

As a result it only left them with feelings of bitterness and anger towards themselves for not measuring up to their parents approval.

Why waste your time trying to win someone over.  You could be using that time to meet your expectations while gaining self confidence in your abilities.    

You will only lose yourself.  Have you ever been so caught up in gaining approval in your relationship that after a while you don't even know who you are?  All of your thoughts and feelings go out the window when your around this person.  Sometimes even when you are not around him.  You no longer get involved in the activities and hobbies you once pursued.  You gave up on your career goals.  You even eliminate friends and family that you were once close to.  Your reasoning?  Because your partner thought it was dumb or that your friends or family did not meet his approval?

If this is the case  you are on the path of self destruction emotionally and mentally.  Giving up on  your dreams or your values is like drowning in a vast blue see.  You struggle for the last bit of air but the water seeping into your lungs is sucking the life out of you.  You try so hard to make it above water, to hold on to the last bit of  your life but you only feel yourself becoming weaker and weaker. 

Giving up on who you are as an individual to meet the approval of others will only harm you in the long run.  After a while you will become a lifeless puppet.  No real thoughts or emotions of your own. 

You can miss out on great opportunities. "You don't have what it takes."  "Your not smart enough."  "Get your head out of the clouds." 
Do you have a passion or gift that no one thinks you should waste your time with?  Have you given up on your dreams because of what someone said?

 What do you feel in your mind, body, and soul?  What is that feeling in your gut, telling you?  Is the feeling so strong that it won't go away no matter how you try to ignore it? 

If this is the case what are you waiting for?  Don't wait for the approval of your peers, or family.
There are so many different opportunities for growth waiting for you.  All you have to do is search for them.

Do some  research on success stories.  Their are real life people out there who have been through the same struggles you have been through but have never given up on their dreams.  They didn't need the approval or permission of others to follow their passion.  In the end their determination payed off. 

You never know.  You could be the next success story.  So keep pressing on!!